Room to Let

Mind ticking over
Without focused care
Thought jumps to thought
Frantic, erratic, nothing there
There’s a hole far inside
Your mental space vacancy
Thinking once used for you and I
Means heart and head lie empty
It seems even when apart
You resided deep within
A modelled version of you
Where I knew what was happening
A room where I always had a view
So when we said no more
You left me twice, once for real, then
You vacated my internal penthouse floor
I’ve mentally bounced around
As I care take your room
Lonely, with a constant sense
You’ll be back soon.

But you never will.

Tears in my Eyes

A pain at my centre
Tears in my eyes
An ache for emotion
All thoughts I despise
Stuck in the moment
When I’m sat with you
You broken in pain
Because, we are through.
The love in between us
Grown ever-so fast
Was real and gave hope
Of a bond, built to last
But the differences
Rose from within to without
Proving no future
Decided, no doubt.
Still emotional tethers
Connect you and I
Hence the pain I am feeling
And the tears in my eyes.

She’s Hating Her Work

She’s hating her work
Life’s not turned out to plan
While you’ve done alright
About the best that you can
She’s unhappy and nervous
You’re in love with her heart
She says she loves you
Which is soon from your start
But then the demons come out
The worries appear
How can she be happy
With you oh so near
She’ll never match up
Or catch on your lead
So she makes you feel sad
States you’re full of greed
When you’re not, you’re just you
And you’ve worked every day
To get better, more successful
Until you did find a way
Because she is lost
Your success can’t mean fun
Doesn’t mean praise
or any sense that you’ve won
It’s an unfairness
You’ve gained over her and the rest
An indication of bias
Not a sign you did best
She’s jealous of your “kingdom”
Your security
Displaying her envy
A lack of maturity
So it’s ending, you can’t
Not because your love’s not true
But by denying your life
She can’t be in love with you

Black Dog Calls

Cornered, trapped
Black dog calls
Melancholy
Towering walls
Lift descends
Bottom of the well
Sinking stomach
Feeling unwell
Lack of grip
No steps to take
Fallen down
Laid low, a fake
The masquerade
Of muddling through
Slips and breaks
Exposing you
Not good enough
Not happy or glad
Loathing of self
Bereft and sad
An anxious mind
Crushes all hope
Poisoned heart
With no antidote
Numbed from joy
Immersed in pain
Doused in dark
In tears again
The black dog calls
I sit alone
Surviving hurt
All on my own

Relationship Wrecked

Wretched conflict
You should have
But you couldn’t
You were too swept up in being you to realise
That you shouldn’t
Have said what you said
Meant what you did
I’d have been better off running
I wish that I’d hid
This news that would hurt you
I tried to protect
Now it’s wretched conflict
Our relationship wrecked

A Simple Life

Emergent start to a new life
A simple life with all you need
Nothing more required
Now judged by mood and deed
Appreciating basics sated
Free from a consumer’s greed
No more exists in life
To re-shackle me now I’m freed

The End of Your World

You will rue this day
Your time has been called
She’s started a fight
The end of your world
She’s said things in anger
That cannot be unsaid
Words like “we’re done
Now reside in your head
She’s questioned your love
Labelled you liar and worse
So now regardless of a make up
Your bond now holds the curse
Of questionable foundation
Twists in the honest base
That will sap all efforts to build
An insipid disease laying waste
To the pillars of beauty
The care you’d overseen
The warmth in your coupling
How together you’d been
Your hurt and your anguish
Corrode the heart at your core
She’s called time on your hope
All promise is lost, “us” is no more

The Birgadier

A life well lived
Moustachioed
Gentleman, brigadier
Buccaneer, cavalier
Whiskers white
Hair as if in flight
Stories from afar
Drinks at the bar
A smile or salute
Fortitude, resolute
Stands for all to see
Timeless chivalry
In military brigade
Of manners made

Red Mist

When you’re raw, it’s hard
Hard to keep the tears in and the fears out
Days of happiness turned
On a few words.
The bright day falls to dark night
Emotions, heartache, take flight
Nothing you can do to make it right
Best to let it be.
Emerge from mist red
See what you could have done instead
Learn that what was said
Was born of love

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