Wretched Anxiety

Brain misfiring
I’m overwhelmed today
Well laid, patterned, plans
Have all gone astray.
Blame me, be unkind
Anxious attack on self
Clawingly undermined
Debilitated mental health.
In this repeated loop,
Very few can find,
Me, let alone a route
To escape an erratic mind.
Unstable, this is why
Why I’m left alone
Who would take this?
This wretched human home

Without Love

Without love
Where would we be?
No bonds between us
No handling with care
A fight for resources
No sense for what’s fair
No balanced emotions
Just hate, rage and will
A battle for survival
Hearts lusting for the kill
It’s love that prevent this
Love shows us a way
To see ourselves in strangers
Let others have their say
So when you go out later
For fun, for work or for chores
Give a smile to fellow travellers
Through love, community endures

No Longer Apart

For the briefest moment
The beat of a heart
You were present
Here, no longer apart
I went to call you
Your scent in the air
Could see you at home
Your eyes and your hair
Your warmth, your love
The feel of your touch
A full sense of you
I miss you so much

Don’t Extrapolate

It’s just me
Trying my best
Most of the time
Except when I stumble
Don’t see demons
There’s no malice
No attempt to leave
All I feel for you is love
Sometimes I forget
Don’t call in and check
But this behaviour
Is just that
Don’t extrapolate
It doesn’t mean
The rest is flawed
Use our definition
Use our version of love
The one where together
We have created a peace
A place of positive calm
Don’t pick at a crack that
Isn’t there before the picking
I love you my love
Trust.

Her Touch

Imperfect day, imperfect night
Images of her confound my sight
Her scent, her voice, evoke so much
Above all else, I miss her touch
Skin to skin, cheek to cheek
Hand in hand, her touch I seek
A long embrace, a fleeting kiss
Side by side in bed, it’s this I miss
We got so close, we meant so much
A perfect love, a perfect touch

Made Of The Same Cloth

Slow and gentle tear in our fabric
Runs from edge to core
Torn from side to side
One made two, together no more
In the moments after parting
Frayed seams reaching out
The two still fit perfectly
A match, a marriage, doubt
We are made of the same cloth
Should two halves not make a whole?
Why separate? Why not mend?
In tearing what was the goal?

Lonely Empty Hurt

Walking surrounded by strangers
Sat at home with the kids watching tv
Working at the office in teams of colleagues
But not one of them ever sees me
I could change my face they wouldn’t comment
Transform my world they wouldn’t care
Be another person they wouldn’t notice
It’s like they aren’t aware I’m even there
I observe their every movement
Discuss the ins and outs, what they do
Pour over their every tiny foible
This is a one way tunnel I’m walking through
It’s lonely at home in my kitchen
I’m lonely in the office back at work
I’m lonely when friends surround me
So lonely, so empty, it hurts

Neg and Nag and Pick

Negatives all the time
Feeling pulled apart
With so much wrong with me
Why did we even start
You clearly had a plan
To neg and nag and pick
To tie me up in knots
To twist me until I’m sick
I told you that’s enough
I said please leave alone
My core and central traits
Or risk being on your own
You couldn’t let me go
You didn’t let me be
The bad is all you saw
You saw no good in me
Or at least so it seemed
From what you did each day
So now I’ve turned you down
And tried to run away
Upset and feeling low
I miss you in spite of how we were
You’ll find your match in time
Someone you love for who they are

Survive

A visit to one who’s love comes with condition and at a cost
A reminder of a mother supportive but now lost
A day to get through waters troubled by staying at the surface
Doing what can be done to not let in negative emotions for no purpose

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